You Don’t Suck

I was sitting at the island in my kitchen, face glued to my laptop and a buffet of paperwork spread out all around me. Across from me, my daughters sat. They had snacks. They had juice. They had homework and a coloring book to keep them occupied. Yet they were still doing their best to drive each other insane, dragging me along with them in the process. I just needed FIVE MORE MINUTES to finish my stack of editing for the day. Five. But somehow we all devolved into a yelling, whining, snapping, not very nice gaggle of irritation.

you don't suckThey had things to keep them busy. What else did they want?!


Me. They wanted me, my attention and I was swatting them away like flies. What a shitty excuse for a mother.

Have you been there before? This doesn’t just pertain to mommas either. Wives, friends, daughters, anyone. Join me over on Mamalode (!!!) to hear why I think you don’t suck—snapping, overflowing with stress, distracted and all.

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This post is part of my 52 Essays project. This year I have set a goal for myself to write one finished piece every week(ish). I’m not sure what you can expect from them because I’m sort of winging it. Some will be good. Some will be less good. Hopefully you’ll love them. Maybe you’ll hate them. We’ll just have to wait and see. ;) 9/52

Local Love | Intrigue Dance and Fitness

Intrigue Dance and Fitness kids birthday party Westchester

It happens every time. As we draw closer to my daughters’ birthdays that Pinterest party pull grabs hold of me and lures me in. I search the specific themes my girls have mentioned some interest in, wanting to push them towards the one that I can come up with the most picture perfect decor and desserts and games and favors for.

It’s so stupid.

When did kid’s parties become more about moms throwing elaborate mini-weddings to show how creative and impressive they are instead of reflecting what the kid actually wants?

This year I tried to slap myself out of it, at least a little. Ellie has been talking about a tea party since we went to a local tea place this summer and she relished every last second of drinking hot cocoa out of her very own, very fancy tea cup. My eyes most definitely lit up at the possibilities that could be found in a tea party.

As her birthday drew closer she threw another element into the mix, deciding she didn’t want just any old tea party. She wanted a Zumba tea party. This was a wrench I was not quite prepared for. How exactly does one throw a proper Zumba tea party? What the hell is a Zumba tea party?

Instead of taking it and running with it, I consulted the only expert on the subject in existence: my daughter. She wanted tea cups and she wanted to do Zumba just like she does at her classes with Tanya at Intrigue.

So, we booked a party at Intrigue Dance and Fitness—and it was seriously the best decision ever.

Continue reading

Diary of a Cleanse: The Clean Program

clean by alejandro jungerHave you ever woken up one day with the realization that maybe you don’t feel as good as you could?

Tired of weird stomach issues and feeling bloated and zapped of all energy, I took to the internet one day searching for books about healing yourself through your food choices. I poked around for awhile before putting six or seven of them on hold at my local library, determined to make a change.

While all of the books were interesting, I was totally pulled in by Alejandro Junger’s Clean and its message of restoring your body’s ability to heal itself by getting rid of inflammation and toxicity. The more I read, the more I nodded my head. I’ve experienced so many of the symptoms discussed in the book and couldn’t think of a good reason not to give his 21-day cleanse a try—especially since I could do it and be done in time to indulge in a big, fat brownie on my birthday. ;)

Now, this isn’t one of those hardcore starvation cleanses. It’s really just an elimination diet (which removes a lot of the foods that cause inflammation) combined with a cleanse that aids digestion—basically, you have a liquid breakfast and dinner (which can be a smoothie, green juice or soup).

Being a relatively clean eater in the first place, I didn’t expect to have too much trouble—although I was afraid of my sweet tooth and tendency to closet binge when stressed. I kept a diary to track my progress and any changes I felt and thought I’d share it with you guys in case you have toyed with the idea of doing something similar.

Warning: I’m going way out on a limb here and sharing detailed statistics (both pounds and inches) and before and after photos. Be gentle.  Continue reading

Girl Boss | Brittany Henson of Grain & Dot

Totally inspired by Sophia Amoruso’s book of the same name, Girl Boss is a series focused on fierce, determined women who go with their gut and create their dream businesses in the process.

Girl Boss | Brittany Henson of Grain & Dot

I am a total sucker for funny phrases in pretty type, so it should come as no surprise that I’m a huge fan of Grain & Dot‘s fabulous paper goods. With fun, witty little sayings, quotes from my favorite TV shows, and uplifting hand-lettered messages, Brittany Henson’s work is everything I love: quirky, refreshing, positive, and fun.

Check out how she started her own handmade business, how she balances dogs and chickens and working from home, and where she finds inspiration—as well as a special treat for my readers! Continue reading

Apples and Trees

bedtime babyOn preschool nights Ellie has the worst time falling asleep. So many thoughts and conversations are swirling around in her little head and she just can’t shut them up.

I’ll read her a story (hopefully one that does not include Barbie) and get her all snuggled in bed and she’ll keep popping her head up, remembering a mermaid Katie brought in for show and tell or how the new boy didn’t know the rules (“He got up when we were in the circle, momma!”).

By the time her eyelids start drooping, I’m pretty sure she has given me a play-by-play of her entire school day.

I came downstairs one night, particularly exasperated at the length of time it took for her to fade and my husband just stared at me, smirking.

“Apples and trees, my friend.”

I looked at him in exaggerated horror. “What are you implying?” Continue reading