You’ve heard some of the things my kids have said. They’re pretty hilarious and out there and sometimes brutally honest. But one day, as I was giving my wild one a stern talking to for trying to put my iPhone into her Pull-Up before bed, I couldn’t help but laugh at myself. Hard. And I realized that it’s not just kids that say the darndest things. It’s parents too.
Can you relate? Send me the ridiculous things you catch yourself saying—either in the comments or by emailing me at jen@cuddlesandchaos.com or tagging me on social media (@cuddlesandchaos on Facebook and Instagram or @jennifergarry on Twitter) and I’ll include my favorites in a future post!
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Jen is a freelance writer and girl mom from New York. When she's not knee-deep in glittery crafts and girl talk, you can probably find her sprawled across her couch in the middle of a Netflix marathon with dark chocolate smeared on her face. The struggle is real.
Hi! I'm Jen, a freelance writer and girl mom who loves reading the newest children’s books as much as I love a good psychological thriller. I believe fiercely in the power of kindness, empathy, and really good quality chocolate. When I'm not knee-deep in glittery crafts and girl talk, you can probably find me sprawled out on my couch in the middle of a Netflix marathon with dark chocolate smeared on my face. The struggle is real. 
we can not eat that goat. In response to connor pointing to a goat, saying bahh, followed by “eat it”.
Jess, that’s hysterical. Unapologetic carnivore! Lol
I just love these – the most common one I say at least on a daily basis is: “If you don’t need to be on a stool, then don’t be on a stool.” The most misinterpreted one is when I try to warn the kids to not walk in front of the grocery cart because I don’t want it to hit them and accidentally say “Don’t walk in front of the cart or else I’ll hit you.” (I’m sure that sounds nice to everyone around us.)
For me, I don’t think anything will top, “Quit spanking your brother’s monkey!”
It was a stuffed monkey. And I was on the phone at the time, talking to a vice principal.