I’m not exactly sure when it started, but for a long time I was in this weird relationship with food. I needed to eat all of it. Like, every last bit that was on my plate. It didn’t matter if I was at a restaurant and there were like three portions piled up or if I was at home and my eyes were just way bigger than my stomach. If it was there, I had to eat it.
Part of me thinks it was my inner cheap ass and hater of waste saying “I’m not letting that end up in the garbage.” Another part of me says I had no willpower and wanted all of the tasty things. It was probably both.
It wasn’t until I started exercising regularly last February that I began thinking more about my relationship with food. After a few months of working out almost daily and losing very little in the pound department, I was immensely frustrated. I was eating healthy most of the time (although trying hard to sweep sugar binges under the rug) and seeing very little for it.
Do you know how annoying it is to sweat your butt off with Jillian Michaels just about every single day and have the scale stare back at you with the same unsatisfactory number week after week? Yes, I was feeling better. Yes, I was absolutely stronger and healthier. But failing to lose any weight when you’re working so hard messes with your head.