WTF Crush: Joe Biden

Yeah. You read that right. I’m resurrecting my short-lived WTF Crush series to love all up on a 69-year old man who has more grandchildren than I have children.

Need a little convincing? I got this.

He should be the star of a toothpaste campaign.

Hello! Those pearly whites shine like sunbeams out of his face. It’s kind of impossible not to fall in love with someone who smiles so widely so much of the time.

I know some people are calling his performance in the Vice Presidential debate last night arrogant and condescending. I get it.

There were moments when he was all, “Alright little boy. Let the grown men handle the important issues that you obviously don’t understand.” But for the most part, I found him completely charming (this post on Vanity Fair sums up what I mean).

His smile and giggle are straight up infectious and I would totally buy any toothpaste he endorsed.

He uses language colorfully.

We all know I’m a word nerd. I like language and I like people who use language in unexpected ways. It’s attractive. It shows that there is a brain in the person’s head that they are actually capable of using (sometimes it might not come out right, but kudos for the effort).

Last night it was clear that it took pretty much all of what Joe Biden had to not scream “BULLSHIT!” across the table. He seemed to consider “crap” once or twice but settled on malarkey and stuff instead. I like it. I like it a lot.

He seems like he’d be fun at parties.

This guy knows how to have a good time. Someone who can laugh so often and so easily during what is kind of a big deal moment for him in this election is going to be a straight up riot when he lets his hair down.

I mean seriously. If this is what Joe Biden is like at a major work function, just imagine the laughs that would ensue when he loosens the tie and starts dancing Gangnam style.

He’s not afraid to tell it to you straight.

Between his “my friend” (which obviously meant that he and Ryan are anything but) and–possibly my favorite line of the night–calling Ryan’s thoughts on Iran a “bunch of stuff,” Joe Biden brought it home that he does not mince words. He will bluntly tell you how he feels.

So when you ask him how you look before you head out on a hot date, you can bet your bottom dollar that he’ll tell you if your ass looks like an oil tanker.

Those, my friends, are the solid building blocks of a winning WTF Crush. Who’s with me?

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